News&Events
Hung has no real news, so he made some up. He worked with the cable news media to come up with some sensational news: People died recently in some country, some business exectutive just gained three million dollars, and William Henry Harrison posthumously received the least-likely-to-die-in-thirty-days-after-taking-office award. Events 5-31-07-Hung will visit the Bismarck North Dakota Elks Lodge, just after realizing he missed the Iowa primary. 6-4-07-Hung plans on a campaign trip to Winnipeg, Manitoba, without the understanding that his visit is actually in Canada. 6-9-07-Hung will go to Massachusetts, to get married to his gay lover. Just because he wants to be so gay. And by gay, we mean happy. 7-1-07-Hung will campaign in the middle part of Connecticut, where he will somehow wear a Red Sox cap and a Yankees cap at the same time. 7-4-07-Hung has planned a July 4th fundraising barbeque in Puerto Rico. Unfortunately, he'll be late, since he's flying out of LaGuardia, and those planes are never on time. 7-27-07-Hung will host a $110/table breakfast at his own house, but is planning on sleeping late, so no one is invited. 8-16-07-Hung has plans to return to Puerto Rico for his campaign, since he missed his July 4th trip. 8-17-07-Hung will campaign in LaGuardia Airport, since his plane will not have yet arrived. 8-17-07-Hung plans to be arrested by the T.S.A., since it's illegal to campaign in an airport, unless the airport is in Manitoba. |
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